The Black Swan and other phenomena

I have been reading an intriguing book The Black Swan - The Impact of the Highly Improbable by Nassim Nicholas Taleb. It talks about a "Black Swan" event - one that lies outside the realm of regular expectations; that carries an extreme impact and that human nature makes us concoct explanations for its occurrence after the fact, making it explainable and predictable.

I'm thinking this applies to blogging as well. In the past two days, I've had the opportunity to spend time with four amazingly-talented, fascinating women in San Francisco. We met through the blogosphere and have been corresponding for some time, so the foundations of friendship were already established. But meeting these women in person has been deeply inspiring, enlightening and in one case, eye-opening.

I'm referring to Tangobaby, Studio Wellspring, Writing Anam Cara and Gypsy Girl's Guide.

The gorgeous and brilliant Tangobaby and beautiful designer and mother-to-be Studio Wellspring and I had a glass of California merlot at my apartment, followed by a lively dinner at Iluna Basque in North Beach. The handsome Basque owner was attentive and charming and the tapas choices excellent.

Read Tangobaby's post "Finding Dark Passage." She told me that the Telegraph Hill apartment where I'm staying is around the corner from where a key scene was filmed. Ironically, I'd photographed the building the day before, without knowing its film noir history.

The lovely and lyrical writer Dierdre of Writing Anam Cara and I had a long lunch at a restaurant at the Ferry Building, then went for a windy walk along the Pier. We talked about writing, the incredible impact of blogging and puzzled over the complicated dynamics of family life.

And Alex, the magnificent creator of Gypsy Girl's Guide and I had dinner last night at Il Trattoria Contadina on Union and Mason, a local favourite I first discovered in 1989. My daughter Jordana attended a preschool down the hill on Union Street and I'd pick her up at the end of the day and we'd hop the cable car to our apartment. The restaurant owner, a smiling Italian woman everyone called "Mama," would come outside and give Jordana sweets. As if that weren't enough enticement to dine there, the sign over the restaurant door says in Italian, "Leave your problems at the door." Last night the staff told me "Mama" had retired to Utah, but the restaurant is still run by her family. And the pasta is as fabulous as ever!

Alex - who is even more beautiful in real life than her pictures - has just returned from her honeymoon in Bali. We talked about creative endeavours, our travels, adventures living abroad and some serious issues that woke me up with a jolt. Alex made me see something that I've avoided acknowledging for some time. She reminded me of things I'd forgotten about the woman I am and the strengths and abilities that will carry me forward. Check out Alex's latest post "Diligent Joy."

All four of these women have touched my life in important and tangible ways. So "the Black Swan effect?" Maybe. All I know is these graceful kindred spirits have encouraged and challenged me and I am thankful for their friendship. And I'm thrilled our paths will cross again very soon!

Comments

[Honeymoon Bound]

A honeymoon package in Bali? She must be brave! I'm planning a safer caribbean honeymoon at the moment. It's great to read your stuff though, very inspiring, thanks as always. -Jen

[patry francis]

When I went to the West Coast, I got a chance to meet several bloggers, too; and I found as you did, that these were not "internet friendships;" they were real friends, who had shared more of their hearts and minds with me than some people I see every day.

Enjoy your wonderful journey.

[frida]

I love that image - the Black Swan effect. I'm very excited about meeting Alex when I get to San Francisco in June/July. My friend from NZ met her last year and wrote to me saying "Oh my goodness, Alex is the San Fran Marianne!" So there is bound to be some electricity when we meet.
Wish you could be there too. That would really generate some sparks.

[Becca]

Tara, this post gave me chills! How exciting for you to meet all these fabulous women, and know we're all part of this international network of writers and creative spirits :)

[Casey]

Hi Tara! I read and loved that book early in the year as well - you make me want to re-read it!
I agree about the wonderful random way we meet people via the internet, and count myself among one fo the lucky ones who's gotten to meet you!
I hope this comment sticks, as I've noticed that comments I've posted before have disappeared.

[Laura]

It is SO wonderful to hear your excitement and energy after some months of distraction and worry for you! I can feel the brisk, cool breezes off San Francisco bay as I read your post. Lucky women to be meeting you---I know from personal experience just how lucky they are ;D.

[Gillian]

You live so inspiringly Tara.
I adore your outlooks on life. Your experiences. Your open mind.
You will go far yet, my friend. The road is endless for you with potentiality.
xoxo We cheer you on! xoxo

[deirdre]

It was a wonderful afternoon. I could never have imagined a little blog could lead to friendship, but I'm very happy it did. xoxo

[Alex]

Dear Tara ~ You are one fascinating woman! I felt like we were two immortal souls transcending time and loosing ourselves in each other's hunger for life and adventure! We even forgot to take a photo together!!! I can't believe it... Next time we must, though! Lol, Alexxxox

[Mary T.]

The www and blogging have curvy and tenacious arms so when we get to meet someone from the blogasphere it is so wonderful to know them as the real people they are. I'm glad it all went so well. Amazing!

[sherry]

Oh I wish I was still in San Francisco and could have met up with you!!! Timing is certainly everything. But I'm glad the 4 of you have had a wonderful time.

[Jeanie]

What glorious encounters! Isn't it amazing to meet people and have that energy of friendships and inspiration? I am off to visit their blogs and become inspired myself, as I always am by you.

[studio wellspring]

oh tara, but i am so the lucky one in this fabulous encounter of blogging penpals meeting for the first time. your energy, wisdom and kindness are the perfect balance to your awe-inspiring creative talents. i have been on cloud-9 ever since our dinner. you gave so much: valuable insights & encouragement from one mama & arky native to another, lovely gifts from your enchanting world, and the immense pleasure of your company. i am overflowing with gratitude & look very forward to spending more time with you very soon.
xxoo, a

p.s. the black swan effect is alive and well ~ i just didn't know it had been given such a lovely name. i will add that book to my list of must reads.

[tangobaby]

Tara, how can we let you leave this city now that it seems so right that you should be here for the foreseeable future? All I can hope for is these Black Swan moments continue to happen for you (and all of us, actually) and that the invisible underpinnings of the universe are working overtime to make sure I can see you often!

(And now I must read that book, too. I know I will love it.)

xoxo!

[rochambeau]

Dear Tara,
All of these woman look fabulous. I don't have time to comment on their sites now, but will later!! On my comment below, I meant feel not fell, but I think you know me by now!
xo

[tinker]

I keep getting lost down the wonderland rabbit hole of links you've share here - what amazing women, and what fun you must be having meeting them in real life.
Wishing you many more wonderful moments and 'Black Swan' events~xox

[rochambeau]

Dear Tara,
I do so share in your joy! What a gift to create electricity out of friendship, to gain oneself through the reflection of others. To marvel at the connections made with a thing called the internet and blogs. Can't wait to visit these lovely woman who have infused your spirit and made you fell filled!
Thinking of you! and Jordana too!
xox
Constance